How will you ride the next wave?

Life is like the ocean waves, a constant repetitive cycle

Big ones, small ones, some we don’t even notice until they have passed

Rising up, crashing down, deep into the sea, hard onto the sand, or perhaps lightly washing over the shore

Smooth or harsh or in between

Continuous…always never ending

Ride the wave, surf, swim against it, or maybe just float?

Take a deep breath for the down part to help you survive until you rise again

You will rise again, but you will have to go under first

The more you struggle the more difficult it will be to hold your breath,

Relax, let go, don’t fight the current, it will take you back up, just don’t resist

Take the down time to think about what you will do the next time you are on top

You will be on top again…

And it too will pass, again

Soon you will be going down again, but how can it be different this time?

How can you make the down time as useful as the rise?

How can the awareness that this down time is only momentary help you?

What strengths can you acquire here to help you achieve what you want when you return to the top?

The entire ride is the journey we call life, it’s the lows that create the highs, and the highs that create the lows,

Cherish them all as if they may not last forever, get the most out of EVERY MOMENT

Life is an ocean and the waves are just moments, no two identical, once gone, never to return exactly the same…

This is your life, your ocean, and the choices are YOURS

When the waves are no longer coming and going, rising and falling, the ride…the journey…is over

Ride the wave, surf, swim against it, or float?

Take a deep breath for the down part to help you survive until you rise again

You will rise again, will you be ready?

 

One Step at a Time…

 

A while back, during a trip to Arizona, I was hiking up one of the beautiful canyons with a small guided group.  Within the first 30 minutes of the 3+ hour hike, a woman in the group said to one of the guides, “I can’t do this, there’s just no way I can make it to the top.”  When the guide suggested that he would walk back down with her and they could wait at the bus until the rest of us returned, I could see the look of utter disappointment on her face.

At that moment she just sat down. The guide told her he would give her a few minutes to make her decision but the rest of the group continued to climb. When the woman noticed me standing there looking at her, she made eye contact with me and smiled.  That was my in…so I sat next to her and suggested that, since she had to wait for everyone anyway, why not just see how far she could get.  Instead of trying to climb to the top, “why not just concentrate on taking one more step, and when you can’t take any more, I’ll stop and rest with you, and then you can either take a few more steps up or we can turn around and head back towards the bus”.

She admitted that the idea sounded better than the alternative and off we went.  We talked about all of the rocks, trees, blooming cactus, lizards, etc. that nature so graciously put on our path as we took one step at a time. Some steps were slow, some more quickly, sometimes we even stopped to smell a flower, laugh at a stumble, or take a picture.  Each step was filled with fascinating conversation, discovery, and breathtaking silence.  Before we knew it, we were admiring the view from the top with the rest of the group.

As we stood there, without a word, she looked at me, gave me a huge hug, and we continued to talk about “nothing” all the way down the canyon. It wasn’t until later that day that I realized, I never even got her name, I’d probably never see her again, and yet she had had a significant impact on my life.  By “helping her”, she actually helped me finally realize that all any of us can ever really do is one step at a time; whether it’s up a mountain, to reach a life goal, or even just getting through the day.

Since then, when I find myself overwhelmed at the thought of a big project, trip, or even a possible future event, I stop and think of her and how we made it to the top. I take a deep breath, try to figure out what I can actually do now, and that’s where I begin, one step at a time. I find my anxiety starts to disappear once I get started. I tell myself that if I get stuck, I’ll assess that actual situation, as opposed to the one I’m imagining, and do what I can at that point. That’s really all we can ever do, isn’t it? I have always said that taking baby steps forward gets you further than standing still, paralyzed at the thought of a giant leap, but now I actually practice what I preach, or at least I try ;-).  I recommend trying it (it really doesn’t required any major changes, just less thinking and more doing…less is more)

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p.s. Most of the time, when I am successful at focusing solely on the step in front of me, somewhere between where I start and finish,  I end up learning what I need to know, or gain the strength required, to figure out and reach the next step more easily; it’s pretty amazing how life works that way!

As I was washing up the breakfast dishes I overheard my two younger sons (my twins) talking about a classmate.  I noticed that what they were saying about him wasn’t very nice so I interrupted them and asked why they were being so mean and what this boy had ever done to them to make them not like him.  Simultaneously they both looked at me, almost laughing, and explained to me that this boy was a friend of theirs, they did like him, and that it was OK to talk about him that way because he talks about himself that way all the time.  Needless to say, my boys and I had a long conversation about insecurities, desires to make friends and/or fit in, the difference between being laughed with and laughed at, etc… and then it was time to start our day.

Later that morning as I was driving, it dawned on me, we really do teach other how to treat us.  Even as a young child, this 5th grade boy was teaching his classmates that making fun of his weight, clumsiness, etc.. was acceptable.  So then what?  If this boys “claim to fame” was these jokes, what incentive was there for him to improve in these areas? But that’s a whole separate post, for purposes of today, think about how you treat yourself. Be aware of how you are telling your friends, family, co-workers, etc that it is OK to treat you, how you expect to be treated.  Don’t be surprised if, for example, your child doesn’t always show you the most respect or appreciation if s/he doesn’t see you showing it to yourself.  Be kind to yourself, treat yourself the way you want others to treat you, because, chances are, they will. The best time to start a change is now 🙂

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What is your Why?

What’s your WHY?  Your burning desire? Your MISSION?  What is your underlying motivation for getting out of bed each day?  Is it to go through the motions one more time?

Purpose:  I believe we all have the same purpose, to live up to our highest/best self and carry out our personal mission, which is to share our unique gifts with others, and I don’t think it matters if you share them with one or many.

My mission: Help people reignite/turn up their pilot light without fear of explosion or extinguishing it. To help you understand your WHY and not be afraid to turn it on so that how you spend your time and who you spend it with is in alignment with that Why, regardless of if others “get it” or not.  To understand it so well that it infuses everything you do.

This is your life, it’s not a dress rehearsal, HAVE FUN!

  1. Stop hiding who you really are; Get focused, get clear on your dreams – no more imposture syndrome, i.e. faking it
  2. Start being selfish – it’s your life
  3. Be creative – stop following others rules/shoulds
  4. Start scaring yourself, leave the comfort zone and explore the edges
  5. Use your wisdom – stop taking life so seriously – it’s not always life or death
  6. Start getting rid of stuff that’s weighing you down, holding you back… ie. Memories…
  7. Take action- stop being “so busy” and DO Something you love
  8. START NOW! – Don’t wait for permission – your life matters too much!!
  9. Instead of asking “Why?” ask yourself, “Why Not?”

Some may feel it’s selfish to take the time to discover your “why” and strive to achieve it, however, what I know is that; it makes you a happier person, you are more fun and pleasant to be around, you’re not filled with resentments or regret, you have more energy, you become more capable and productive and it comes more easily to you.

Take control of your life, your priorities, what is meaningful and important to you.  Give yourself permission to choose YOU, you deserve it. Stop living on auto pilot and start living, bumps, wrong turns and all.

Sometimes, when I think about life, I envision flowing water…If you always take the path of least resistance, the auto-pilot route, that looks like water coming out of a factory built faucet. But…if you leave your comfort zone and overcome obstacles, take paths less traveled or carve new ones, make wrong turns and figure out how to get back on track, even take a leap of faith… now that looks like an incredibly beautiful, flowing stream, winding through the woods, filled with water falls, calm deep pools, bends and turns, shallow pockets, rushing currents and so much more… How do you want to see your life flowing? What is Your Why?